From Crazies to Dirty Feet

Well boys and girls Jacksonville has finally proved to be a place where pussies and inappropriate doll makers gather.

The video I last posted is no longer working because the doll, made in the likeliness of a toddler who was killed, is no longer for sale. The people have spoken! Outraged by the outrageous doll, Showbiz Promotions buried their head in the sand and suspended all sales. I gotta say I'm shocked. In the era of the Barack Obama golden coin I was sure this doll would sell out. Well, Jacksonville you have restored a bit of my faith in the American people. Unfortunately, not in the American singer.

The last time I saw that much crying I was 16 at the opening of Titanic, and yes, it was me.

Sharon Wilbur and her dog Sasha made it to Hwood and I don't know how. I mean she sang OK, except when she was singing baby. It was like her mouth couldn't pronounce the word. It sounded babay or baaabaay. I wonder if she ever lived with Mr. Murder? I did and am just now able to use the word. But she is obviously obsessed with her dog and that's annoying. I mean it's a dumb lap dog! It would be different if she had cats and they do tricks -- like me!


We shall see if this dog lovin' already attempted an album Floridian makes it past Hollywood Hell Week.


Young Janet Jackson look-a-like, Jasmine Murray was great! Finally we are able to see someone that can actually sing! She's cute and likable, it will be hard for Mr. Murder to slam this one.....


Now on to Salt Lake City.......

The audition that sticks out in my head the most is Frankie Jordon. HATE HER! This Amy Winehouse imitator wowed the judges and I just can't understand. What happened to originality? There is nothing original about copying someone who is! Besides all that, AMY FUCKING WINEHOUSE! All we need is one. I learned this lesson when I was a fan of Taylor Hicks, we already have one or two of those and we don't need no more!!!! I hope she doesn't make it past Hell Week, it will be just like that raspy voiced chick from last year, one trick poney! I'm hating on you fake Amy!!

It seems like everyone in Salt Lake City is a fucking mom. Fake Amy is and so is tattoo arm. Difference? Tattoo was actually good.








This 22 year-old mother has a pretty sweet sleeve tattoo, which is conveniently hidden in this pic. However, she has an original voice, hot, a divorcee and has a bad ass tattoo. GO Megan Corkrey!


I think they would make a good fantasy match up. Maybe they can have their kids fight. That's exactly what season 8 is missing. A good ol' fashion...

BABY FIGHT!!!

And then there is sissy-boy-class-president Austin Siseros. This guy! What a wuss! He's hard at work leading the his fellow students down a path of boring adulthood. Nice song pics buddy, way to be 35 in a 17 year-old body. The only thing that's saving you is you kinda remind me of Will Stronghold which in turn, reminds me of "I'll go to jail for you my son." So you're safe for now. Just stop being a walking vagina and you'll do ok.









I'll sum it up with two that I think I'll remember. Taylor Vaifanua, the 17-year-old amazon. She did justice to Joyful Joyful and will make it past Hollywood Week for sure. Then there's the cute little hippie chick Rose Flack. Yes, she has extremely dirty feet and probably smells but she's cute and sings well. Good luck little hippie.

















Thursday promises the last 2 cities of auditions, just in time for Hollywood Week, starting Tuesday! Who will make it? Who will be sent home ashamed and broken? Time will tell. One thing is certain, the crying will continue.